Defend Your Fatherland!

The 23rd of February in Russia is a Day of the Defender of the Fatherland. In the Soviet times it was called the Soviet Army and Navy Day and it was a minor holiday (not even a day off) celebrated only by the military. Only men who served in the Army (or Navy) got congratulations postcards. In the times of “capitalism” not only the name of the holiday was changed but a couple of years ago it became a day off. But the most important change with the holiday was made by new Russian capitalists. They thought, “Hey, we have that All Women’s Day on the 8th of March when our sales of perfume, flowers, mink coats and gold rise ten times but there's no holiday for men! We are loosing zillions of rubles!” Forget about all those militaristic things. Aren’t all Russian men defenders of the Fatherland? Including kids or guys who never in their life had anything to do with the military. All male spices deserve a gift or two once a year. Something similar happened in the US with the Fathers’ Day, as far as I know.

Probably this disregard to the original idea of the 23rd of February made designers of this holiday billboared careless and sloppy. Posters was produced by Moscow government but Muscovites saw only 50 of them and for one day only. Then the billboards were hastily dismantled. The problem was the picture of the ship. She has nothing to do with the Russian Navy. Actually it’s USS Missouri (BB-63).

That’s what Wikipedia says about this cruiser:

During World War II, Missouri saw action at the Battle of Iwo Jima and the Battle of Okinawa, and shelled the Japanese home islands of Hokkaido and Honsh?. In the 1950s, Missouri fought in the Korean War and was decommissioned into the United
States Navy reserve fleets. She was recommissioned in the 1980s, and refitted with modern armaments. In 1991, she participated in the Gulf War.
Missouri was decommissioned a final time on 31 March 1992, having received a total of eleven battle stars, and is presently a museum ship at Pearl Harbor.

Talking about the aircraft on the poster. It’s produced in Russia, no problem, but Su-30МКI is an export model! It’s not adopted by the Russian AF. Almost all of these aircrafts were sold to India.

So what do we see at the end? An Indian fighter attacking Pearl Harbor?

Via gazeta.ru

Related Tags: Russia, Moscow, holiday, billboard, goof, USS Missouri, pearl harbor, sukhoi

Buratino-the-Pooh

Winnie-the-Pooh cake. Do you notice there’s something wrong with the chubby bear? He definitely became anorexic – so skinny and scraggy.. No, it’s not Pinocchio – it’s Buratino. That’s what Wikipedia says about the character:

Buratino (Russian: Буратино) is a main character of the book The Golden Key, or Adventures of Buratino by Aleksey Nikolayevich Tolstoy. Buratino is a Russian adaptation of Pinocchio - like Pinocchio, e is a long nosed wooden puppet, though there are many differences in plot and theme in his story. The name Buratino is derived from the Italian burattino, which means puppet. Buratino quickly became hugely popular among children in the Soviet Union, where the book was published in 1936 and remains so to this day (though present-day children are equally familiar with Buratino's Western counterpart). The name Buratino was used on a variety on products and stores marketed to children in the Soviet Union--most notable of these is the Buratino soft drink brand.

No, Russians don’t call Pinocchio Winnie. Why is this picture on the cake’s box? Call “Vega-Nord” Bakery hot line.

Related Tags: Russia, Moscow, Winnie-the-Pooh, Pinocchio, Buratino

Come a Little Closer

Russian Marketing Blog never stops its pursuit for knowledge wherever it can find it. There’s so much that we, Russians, have to learn in marketing and advertising. Take, for example, advertising in funeral services or coffin making. Russians simply don’t know how to promote such services effectively but Germans do. “Come a little closer. And you might need funeral services from Bergmann”. Straight to the point!

A couple of years ago I got by chance an invitation to an Italian Funeral Services Trade Show in Moscow. This trade show was almost secret and strictly B2B. Only wholesale clients got special passes and I was probably the only potential retail customer there. Despite the general atmosphere of gloominess associated with the industry in general, the show was almost cheerful and very entertaining. It reminded me of automobile shows. Only there were premium coffins instead of cars and showgirls were all dressed in black micro-skirts.

Italian funeral masters know how to build customer loyalty. I was really impressed by the catalogue of Cofanifunebri. Their best coffins go together with barely dressed young widows whose incredible postures could only be excused by their immeasurable grief. Some of them even go hysterical and start doing wacky things. I particularly recommend Madonna, Greca and Orchidea coffins.

Related Tags: funeral services, coffin makers, advertising, promotion, trade shows, Germany, Italy

MacWedding

Via Adfreak comes this wonderful piece of news found at Newsday.

What beats Valentine’s Day at White Castle? A wedding reception at McDonald’s. Corey Cutcheon and Doreen Brown of Farmingville, N.Y., on Long Island, had no money for a proper reception. “Corey said to me, ‘Why don’t we try McDonald’s?’” says the bride, according to Newsday. The newspaper runs the numbers for us: 50 guests; 14 cheeseburger value meals; 13 Filet-o-Fish sandwiches; 17 Chicken McNugget meals; four hot-fudge sundaes; 44 medium sodas; some complimentary chocolate Ronald McDonald cake; and a total bill of $250.59.

On average $5.01 per guest. Can anyone guess what gifts did the guests bring to the newly wed? Your suggestions.

Yermak: Sterilized and Restored

Yermak is a great figure of Russian history – the Conqueror of Siberia. That’s what Wikipedia says about Yermak:

On October 26, Yermak captured the capital of the Siberian hanate, Qashliq (17 km from the city of Tobolsk). Since Uchum still had enough forces to resist, he suddenly attacked Yermak on August 6, 1585 in the dead of night and killed most of his people. Yermak was wounded and tried to swim across the Wagay River (Irtysh's tributary), but drowned under the weight of his own chainmail.

This is not unusual when a small dairy names its milk “Yermak”. The caption above Yermak's portrait – “Sterile. Restored.” – takes one aback. If you didn’t get it – restored from powered milk, not from the dead.

Related Tags: Russia, Russian history, Yermak, milk, dairy

Coca Cola vs Olimp

Vodka Bilenka parody commercial (I wrote about it here) was not left unnoticed by Coca-Cola. “Coca Cola Beverage Ukraine” sent an angry letter to the CEO of “Olimp” company (producer of Bilenka). Olimp should stop broadcasting the controversial commercial because it resembles the one of CocaCola. The news came from Kommersant – Ukraine.

Lesya Zhulinskaya from Coca Cola Beverage Ukraine said that the abovementioned letter was sent to Olimp at the end of December last year but Olimp simply ignored it. For this reason Coca Cola decided to sue Olimp.

I’m almost sure that the public scandal is exactly what any vodka brand needs. Olimp managers must be crying, “Yeah! We did it!” Vodka brands in Russia and Ukraine have their own way to build consumer recognition and loyalty. They use any possible means to provoke scandals as that one. Vodka is a sin product and vodka brands’ rowdy behavior is viewed favorably by their target audiences.

It seems like Olimp is not too lavish when it comes to advertising. Its Coca-Cola parody commercial is so low-budget that it hurts. Now Coca-Cola itself gives Bilenka a chance to be in the news. Any publicity is good as long as it is free © Madonna.

Related Tags: Ukraine, vodka, Belinka, Coca Cola, Olymp, scandal

DIYers of the World, Unite!

For anyone of you who think that all DIY designers live only in Russia. Here’s an example of American DIY signage and naming. This is not a spoof.



Welcome to New Port Ritchie, Florida.

Related Tags: DIY, signage, design

Battle of the Ad Blogs 2006

The Battle of the ad blogs, sponsored by Jewelboxing and pixiesdiscs was organized by AdLand – one of the most serious and informative ad blogs ever.

After cleaning up votes from cheaters (or in the some cases from companies with one IP for all) in the nomination “Best non English language ad blog” ADVERTKA Russian ad community blog became the clear winner.

Congratulations!

Related Tags: advertising, markting, battle of blogs, ad blog, Russia, Advertka

Here’s yet another example of DIY signage and promotion. The sign reads, “Wedding bouquets.” Then below, “Loyal customers get discounts”. Hmm. How many times should a woman marry to qualify for a loyal customer status?

Related Tags: Russia, flowers, brides, DIY, customer loyalty

"Baby" Grocery Store

Another example of DIY signage and naming. This is a sign of a grocery store named “Baby” (Malysh). The caption underneath goes, “Vodka. Beer. Groceries. Vodka. Beer.” The baby on the picture looks pretty old to me but then… If from the infantile age you went vodka-beer-groceries you’d look like this at the age of five. Just make sure that you only drink vodka and beer your pediatrician recommends.

Related Tags: Russia, grocery store, baby, vodka, beer, groceries, humor

DIY Design

When you have a tiny stall selling milk and cheese at a huge open market you definitely want a catchy sign to attract customers. One way is to hire a designer to do the job but they are very expensive. And then – didn’t you always get A’s for arts class at junior school? DIY approach pays off.


This sign reads, “Dairy Products”. The store owner and his wife did everything themselves from concept development to painting, including creation of these exclusive wobbly fonts. Don’t laugh! With the help of this ad the number of customers tripled – everyone wanted to shake the artists’ hands.

With this ad Russian Marketing Blog open a new category “DIY Advertising and Design”.

Related Tags: Russia, signage, design, DIY, dairy products, humor

Beer Goggles

As alcohol marketing is the most sophisticated and well-developed segment of the industry in this country Russian Marketing Blog never stops its pursuit of various alcohol related facts. Take “beer goggles”, for example. Everybody knows that after a couple of beers (or some vodka shots) everyone around you becomes prettier. As we say in Russia, “There’s never lack of pretty women – only lack of vodka”.

Scientists at Manchester University conducted a special research to work out a formula to calculate how “beer goggles” affect a drinker’s vision. The project was financed by eye care firm Bausch & Lomb PureVision. What for? Are they working on special lenses that would protect drunk women from ugly men (or vice versa)? Judging from the result of the project their money were spent for nothing. Researchers didn’t find anything new.

First, they discovered that “beer goggles” affect men and women alike. Second, they calculated that the formula “more beer – more beauties around” works only to a certain limit. Then a subject under test passes out. Third, additional factors include the level of light in the room, the room's smokiness and – what a revelation! - the drinker's own eyesight.

Via Agendainc

Related Tags: alcohol, beer goggles, Manchester University, research

Crazy Juice

I think Russia has every right to boast the highest number of different juices and juice blends on the market. Name any possible fruit on earth and you find that its juice is available at any Moscow hypermarket around the corner. My favorite is J-7 blend of pawpaw, mango and avocado.

Baltimor is a leading Russian producer of ketchups that made up its mind to earn extra rubles on the growing juice market. It decided to occupy the vegetable juices niche. Ketchup is just a highly concentrated tomato, onion, pepper juice, you know. And Baltimor knows how to make ketchup. “8 Vegetables” brand was introduced just two years ago and soon became a hit. Although the blend of eight vegetables sounds very intimidating, the taste is superb. Baltimor did not rest on its laurels and went on introducing more juice blends one crazier than another. Take for example a blend of pumpkin, carrots and honey.

In January 2006 the seventh taste was launched. I think it was created to celebrate the Year of Red Dog. It’s a blend of red beet, red cabbage and ginseng. Something truly oriental. If you look at the package closer you’ll also notice pictures of pomegranate, carrots and green leaves of a plant I don’t know (mint?). Somehow they forgot to mention these extra ingredients in the caption. By the way, is pomegranate a vegetable?


Package design by ID Fabrika.

Related Tags: Russia, Baltimor, juice, vegetables, Red Dog