Silver Vodka

Every bottle of this "Standart" vodka has a small silver coin. Coins are different so one has a chance to become an owner of a good collection. Recommended retail price is 160 rubles ($6.15).

What do you see?

I see a man (left) and a squatted woman with a huge hair do (right) who's giving the man a blow job.

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I cure AIDS

Noble pirates

When you buy licensed Windows you sponsor Iraqi war

The most expensive apple grater in the world

Test it in motion

License plate vodka

Prodvizheniye company from St.Petersburg promotes a vodka brand RUS that should be national and local at the same time. It’s label looks like a car license plate with regional codes. If you live in Chita you buy 75 vodka but if you’re from Saratov then you choose 64. Your local chauvinism should prevent you from buying ‘alien’ vodkas. I’m sure St.Petersburgers (78 code) would angrily refuse even to touch 97 vodka (Moscow). But wait! Moscow has at least three codes: 97, 99, 117. Muscovites are already too rich and now they get at least four different vodkas while the rest of the country must be satisfied with only one.

Rollton

It’s unclear to me why all prizes for the most stupid, ridiculous and unfocused commercials in Russia are always won by ramen noodles producers. Take this piece of commercial by Rollton, for example. If you want to win your man give him Rollton ramen noodles. Right! This is a kind of birthday dinner every homeless dreams about.

Click to watch

Get Out of My Way!

Viseum Ad Agency started this new campaign for Hummer. “Get Out of My Way!” Exactly! I’m not sure who exactly buys Hummers in Europe or the US (Borat?) but in Moscow (judging by their driving habit) they are all blood-thirsty Trolls from Mordor. It’s hard to say as windows are always heavily tinted. This ad was criticized by Russian advertising community for being actually a call for irresponsible behavior.

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Red Devil

Red Devil is the first Russian energy drink that came way before Red Bull etc. that were much too expensive for Russians ten years ago. But several years ago Red Bull, Burn and almost every other energy sodas did come to Russia leaving Red Devil with its outlandish design almost obscene. Red Devil became alcoholic then highly alcoholic but it didn’t really help. So this year Red Devil decided to become really hip as well.

This is Red Devil old design.

And this is what it became thanks to Park Studio (Moscow).

Vodka safety

When you buy expensive vodka in Russia you want to be sure that nobody poured some home-made stuff into a branded bottle. Sometimes it happens. All you need is supply of empty bottles from babushkas, a simple instrument to plug bottles, tap water and pure alcohol. Not with new Nemiroff. Note the red ring around the bottle neck. If someone opens the bottle it is gone and no one will ever manage to restore it.

Generation P

A movie based on Viktor Pelevin’s novel “Generation P” (in English “Homo Zapiens”) will be released at the end of 2007. The draft name for the movie is “Wow!” (in Latin). Viktor Ginzburg (producer) finds the book protagonist’s (Vavilen Tatarskiy) very similar to what he felt when he and his parents emigrated from the USSR to the US. “I became a schizophrenic as two cultures (American and Russian) co-exist inside me”.

Pelevin’s novel is hilarious, highly philosophical, absurdist and creepy at the same time. Generally speaking it is about the violent collision of naïve Russian men in the street with horrors of uncontrollable and unpredictable capitalism. Unfortunately 70% of the novel’s humor and sarcasm is lost to those who didn’t live in Russia through wild 90’s and especially through the 1998 financial crisis.

My favorite quote, “There are several methods of watching TV the zen way. First, as a zen beginner you watch TV with the screen and sound on. Then you watch it with the screen off but sound on. And later when you become a real zen master you can watch TV with both screen and sound off”.

I'm back

Sorry for not updating the blog for so long. Too much work and no play.

Reklama Review by Alex Shifrin

Alex Shifrin from eXile makes another Reklama Review. This time about Sobranie advertising efforts in Russia.

"There is a fine line between genius and stupid. Sobranie, who can best be described as a fourth-tier tobacco player in a three-tier market, has somehow managed to overstep this line. I'm talking about their 2007 advertising push for Sobranie Red, a mid-range cigarette brand produced in Austria for that exotic Evropeyskiy effect. Incidentally, I've always been amused by local brands who, in order to somehow seem more premium, talk-up their European roots. They incorrectly assume that The Old Continent's stagnant social rot isn't nearly as despicable as Russia's New Reformer corruption. Personally, I'll take the latter any day. The sex is much better.

Sobranie's first ads are starting to appear in subway stations around Moscow. The image, oddly similar to Salvador Dali's "The Persistence of Memory", depicts a cloudy field and what looks like a ficus tree tied to a golf iron, with the slogan "your style".

Sobranie Red is a mass consumer brand, with really confused positioning. On the one hand, it tries to appear premium, using icons like a Ferrari on its website, playing on its import status. On the other hand, Sobranie is priced like any cheap mid-range smoke. Anyone who has ever worked over here knows that Russians are very suspicious consumers, and don't believe in a good deal. If something is under-priced or is on sale, to a Russian it can only mean that there's something wrong with it. IKEA had to completely re-brand their clearance sales away from the notion of a "good priced deal" last year so that consumers wouldn't think that there was some sort of defect with the offered sale items.

When the brand launched last year, Russian consumers didn't know what to make of it. Quasi-premium positioning, and a suspiciously low price? Feeling like they made no impact last year, the Sobranie team has created their magnum opus of marketing vaudeville and possibly alienated every remaining consumer with a surreal campaign appealing only to the most astute student of Surrealism.

Despite what Sobranie may believe, they are still in launch phase for this brand, and will remain there until consumers begin to understand it and show loyalty. When you launch a brand, you need to create a lasting and relevant message for the consumer to take away. This message needs to somehow relate to the consumer's sensibilities, or at the very least, stay relevant to their scope of experience and understanding. For many Russians, the ficus-golf thing may very well be the first time that they experience the brand. Who in Russia, other than Sobranie's expat directors, play golf? What the hell does an Asian fig tree have to do with local common sense? If you're confused, so is the rest of Russia. It's like a David Lynch film in print.

Incidentally, the top tobacco players got together a long time ago to set out a few rules of engagement between themselves. It's sort of a way to stay ahead of litigators by doing some internal policing. Top amongst these rules are internal restrictions on the usage of nature, sport or any other healthy-lifestyle associated imagery in tobacco advertising, meaning that Sobranie's ficus-golf ad is a big no-no. Obviously, Sobranie wasn't invited to this particular meeting. Seeing the ad really drove home the tobacco industry's non-perception of the Sobranie brand as true competition. It reminded me of that scene in Animal House when Greg Marmalard, president of Omega House dismissively led Larry and Flounder to the back of the Omega rush party, "...over there is Terry Auerback, captain of the swim team...and Jugdish, Mohammet, Lonny..."

It reminds me of an old Russian joke. Wild West. Two cowboys are sitting at on a porch near saloon sipping whiskey. Then all of a sudden a dreadfully looking cowboy on a black horse rushes like a lightening making a lot of noise, yelling, firing into the air and disappears into the darkness. “Who’s this guy?” – “Oh, that one. We call him Joe-that-nobody-could-get.” – “Is he really so difficult to catch.” – “Just nobody gives a damn about him.”

What's the point?

Chewing gum just to freshen your breath is a thing of the past. Now with an innovative new gum from Japan, gum can freshen your whole body. Approximately an hour after chewing the gum, the special aroma component is emitted from your skin through the use of the new substances geraniol and linalool.

Available in three different flavors, Fuwarinka fresh citrus, Fuwarinka fruity rose, and Otokokaoru rose menthol for men. $7 for a set of 2 packs (single flavor or mixed pack) 9 pieces per pack.

What’s the point? Why can’t I simply use deodorant to smell like fresh citrus? Why should I use process the flavor through my stomach, kidneys and liver with the help of menacingly sounded chemicals to freshen my sweat?

Diva for Women

To counter-balance sexist chocolate “Nestle for Men” Diva decided to launch a new product – juice for women only. It enhances your hair, fights caries and completely wipes off all negative aspects of PMS.

To watch Diva commercial click here.

Good ol' times

Many many years ago you could also by injectable opium (from the juice of the poppy) by mail order.

Coconuts

Just one hundred years ago cocaine was regarded as wonderful medicine especially as anaesthetic. Cocaine tooth drops for kids one could buy at a drug store around the corner together with cocaine tooth paste, cocaine tobacco (good for sore throat) and certainly Coca-Cola. This soda was often called ‘spring’ for its wonderful therapeutic effects. Cocaine was banned from no prescription sales only in 1914.

Moscow club “Coconut” (Kokos is slang for cocaine in Russian) is open 24 hours a day and is not expensive.

Lounge cafe Barkhat in St.Petersburg invites its dear guests to a chic New Year party for elitny public only. “Innocent snow lies on the mirror of soul. New Year is coming. Go away, shit, go away”.